Accentuating Service From Laura Lieff

Be Proactive About Your Health
Published: 12:0--20
Before writing this blog post I would like to wish everyone a Happy Passover and or a Happy Easter If you don 39 t celebrate either holiday I hope that you 39 re enjoying the weekend I would also like to take this opportunity to thank all of the wonderful people who write to me praising my blog posts and my blog Although it 39 s impossible for me to thank you all individually I read all of your comments and I appreciate them more than I could ever express Be Proactive About Your HealthThe one thing that is more important than your family your friends your work and your pets is your health Although many of us don 39 t give enough thought to our health without good health we risk suffering from various disabilities and even a shorter life There are people who are afraid to go to doctors and others who pride themselves on never going to a doctor These people are taking unnecessary risks as frequently what could become a very serious issue if left unchecked can be for all intents and purposes a non-issue if found and treated early If you are proactive about going to an internist and whatever other doctors you need to go to i e eye doctor gynecologist dermatologist etc and taking the appropriate tests for someone your age and with your familial health risks I assure you that most of the time you can avoid a serious illness and or an untimely health-related death There are many diseases that don 39 t present with symptoms until they 39 re at an advanced stage and that is why it 39 s important to go to an internist at least once a year and to have your blood and urine tested at least once a year Just because you feel fine you shouldn 39 t assume that you ARE fine 160 My purpose in writing this blog post isn 39 t too frighten you it 39 s to get you to be more proactive about your health 160 Recently I had a mild bout of vertigo I didn 39 t think much of it because I was only experiencing it once a day for less than a minute upon getting up from bed I had the vertigo for a week before mentioning it to my internist When I told her about it she got me an appointment with a neurologist for that very afternoon Although vertigo is typically caused by a minor ear issue it can be a symptom of a stroke a TIA or a brain tumor It took six days for me to complete the various tests that the neurologist wanted me to have As it turned out thankfully my vertigo was from a minor ear issue Although that is typically the case based on what I read if I had had a TIA or a stroke I would have had to be put on a blood thinning medication immediately to prevent a stroke or another stroke I understand that internists sometimes rush patients to specialists to protect themselves legally however in the process they 39 re also protecting their patients I always prefer having an unusual symptom like vertigo checked out thoroughly than to be dismissive of it and think that I 39 m probably fine 160 One of my friends misinterpreted my reasons for being proactive about my health he thinks that I 39 m hoping to have a serious illness My friend doesn 39 t seem to understand that I 39 m proactive about my health because I don 39 t take my good health for granted I want to ensure that if I have the misfortune of getting something serious it will be caught early enough to be treated and cured and I want to do everything in my power to avoid getting something serious Being proactive about your health also includes eating healthily getting enough sleep exercising and socializing It doesn 39 t include smoking excessive drinking taking illegal drugs and or not protecting yourself from sexually-transmitted diseases I 39 m not telling you anything here that you don 39 t already know I 39 m just trying to emphasize that although you 39 re not responsible for the genes that you inherited you ARE responsible for taking good care of your health
Who Is A Right One
Published: 53:0--20
I believe that there is more than one quot right one quot for all of us The older we get the more we hear quot All the good ones are taken quot and other like comments If we had only one soul mate and that soul mate were dead we 39 d be seriously out of luck I 39 m not saying that it 39 s easy to meet a right one You have to put yourself out there join groups and or clubs take courses take up a sport or new hobby go to cultural events that interest you work for your political party try online dating etc Most people have trouble meeting a right one for one or more of the following reasons they 39 re very discriminating and or won 39 t settle they have unrealistic expectations they are workaholics and put no time or effort into meeting new people they 39 re very unappealing physically or mentally they have no social graces they 39 re pathologically shy or obnoxious they 39 re mentally or physically ill they 39 re loners they have poor self-esteem their 160 personal hygiene leaves a lot to be desired they 39 re very pessimistic and it shows and they don 39 t really want to or are ambivalent about meeting a right one Who is a right one There are a multitude of answers to this question as we 39 re not all searching for the same kind of person Some of us want the most beautiful or handsome person in a room of 1 000 people others want the wealthiest others want the most brilliant others want the funniest etc I believe that if you 39 re interested in having a good happy marriage or long-term relationship you should focus on someone who has a good character That person is more likely than any of the others to be a right one Looks fade people can lose their wealth through bad investments multiple divorces or a really bad one a person with a brilliant mind and or a person who is very funny can lose it through mental or physical illness The only constant is integrity A person with a good character a k a integrity very rarely changes He or she is the one who will be by his partner 39 s side no matter what is going on - through sadness illness successes and celebrations He or she will communicate with his or her partner so that the partner doesn 39 t feel as if he or she is living with a stranger or isn 39 t trusted He or she won 39 t embarrass his or her partner by treating others badly or by being immoral or unethical He or she will have his or her partner 39 s back and will respect and admire his or her partner I recently read that 70 of married women and 72 of married men are unfaithful to their spouse I found these statistics to be both surprising and depressing Unless a couple is very short of funds there is no reason why they can 39 t seek help from a professional marriage or relationship counselor Just because a lot of people are unfaithful it doesn 39 t necessarily follow that your spouse or significant other or the person whom you 39 re destined to meet are or will be After all 30 of women and 28 of men are faithful to their spouse If you want to meet a right one it might take some time and a boatload of patience and endurance but there are still some good guys and gals out there Make sure to pay attention to your gut instincts intuition while in the dating market Once you 39 ve been out there for a while you 39 re usually able to discern who is sincere and who isn 39 t The person who likes to whisper quot sweet nothings quot in your ear is probably not a right one There 39 s a reason why these phony words or lies are called sweet nothings and the reason is that you 39 ll get nothing of real value from the whisperer Get going -- get out there It 39 s a big world with a lot of people and you never know when a right one will come along Hopefully you 39 ll recognize his or her value when he or she does come along Bon chance
Be Healthy - Love Your Work
Published: :16:--/2
I 39 d like to thank all of you very much for sending me your approval of and enthusiasm for my blog posts If I had enough time I 39 d thank you all individually but I get so many comments that I can 39 t Also I frequently can 39 t tell to which blog the writer is referring The bottom line is that I read all of your comments and very much appreciate them ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I spend most of my time doing work-related work It doesn 39 t always feel like work because I love what I do for a living and feel very fortunate that I do When I 39 m not doing work-related work I 39 m online shopping researching something looking for restaurants or movies reading articles of interest to me and posting on social media In other words I 39 m doing a variety of work most of the time Some might say that I 39 m a workaholic I might even agree with them as although I love whatever leisure time I have I thrive on being productive It 39 s great to know that there are things awaiting my attention upon waking up Work keeps me enthusiastic about life and plugged into the world 160 Admittedly there are times that I wish that I had more time to relax but I suspect that if I did I 39 d look for a project on which to work Once in a rare while I give myself a full day off to veg out see a movie or a friend etc As much as I enjoy working I enjoy relaxing too 160 Even if I could retire I wouldn 39 t want to at least not at this time It would be nice to have an additional day off but that 39 s not a viable option right now Although most people work to earn money and to quot contribute quot in some way a few people I know and I are motivated primarily by the love of being productive and the love of what we do for a living That 39 s not to say that we 39 re willing to work without being compensated appropriately for our efforts but to say that money isn 39 t the primary motivating force for us Work isn 39 t always healthy though especially if you 39 re under constant pressure For example if you work for difficult people if you work at something that you don 39 t enjoy and or if you aren 39 t earning what you think you 39 re services are worth work can be very stressful for you The takeaway from this post is that in order to enjoy life more you should love the work that you do If you truly love what you do for a living it 39 s less like work and more like an avocation
How To Get Promoted
Published: 00:0--20
If you 39 re an ambitious person and want to get ahead in your career there are a number of things that you should consider and that you need to do First of all you should be certain that you 39 re in the right career for you and that you work at a company that prefers promoting its employees to hiring from the outside To be in the right career means that you 39 re good at what you do and that you enjoy it Secondly you should be approachable and friendly towards everyone with whom you come in contact on the job Being friendly doesn 39 t translate into spending a lot of time in the kitchen or at the proverbial water cooler It means being pleasant around your coworkers and others with whom you come into contact It 39 s wise to not participate actively in office gossip although it 39 s hard to avoid hearing it If you 39 re asked to volunteer an opinion it 39 s best to be noncommittal or neutral Since it 39 s not always easy to discern who is gunning for the same promotion that you 39 d like to get you don 39 t want to say anything that could be damaging to you if it were to be repeated to the wrong person or misinterpreted 160 Thirdly you should do the best work of which you 39 re capable at your current position Don 39 t be content doing the bare minimum just to get by Go above and beyond what 39 s expected of you whenever possible and make sure that your boss knows what you 39 ve done Also if you have free time ask your boss for additional assignments with which he or someone else in the department might need assistance Try to find out as much as you can about how things are done and or how things work in positions other than your own Fourthly you should dress appropriately for the position that you 39 re seeking Image counts Fifthly try to become expert at an important function of your department Try to be the quot go to quot person of the group It goes without saying that you should show up on time and try to avoid being the first person to leave for the day Of course it makes sense to investigate what the possible promotion entails so that you 39 re gunning for a position that you would enjoy If it turns out that you wouldn 39 t enjoy the next move up you might consider whether there 39 s another position that 39 s a promotion that you would enjoy or whether you could make a lateral move that could lead to a somewhat different career path Once you 39 ve been at your current position for a while and you know that you 39 re a valued employee you should let your boss know that you would love to be considered for any positions that should come up that are more advanced than your current position
Do Business With Respectful Business People Only
Published: 57:0--20
I recently contacted someone with whom I briefly shared an office more than 25 years ago to find out whether she 39 d be willing to pay me a finder 39 s fee for referring good candidates to her She said that she would When I told her that I 39 d write an agreement regarding our orally agreed-upon business arrangement she became defensive and said quot Don 39 t you trust me quot To assure her that my wanting to get our agreement in writing was no reflection on her I told her that this is the way that I do business and that I can count on one hand the number of people I trust A red flag went up immediately as people who don 39 t want to sign agreements frequently don 39 t want to be accountable I emailed the woman the agreement It was a straightforward simple one-page agreement Days went by and I still hadn 39 t received a signed copy back from her 160 When I told the woman that I needed to get back to my client she promised me that she 39 d sign the agreement and send it back to me that Saturday On Saturday I received an email from her telling me that I 39 d have the signed agreement in my hands by that night I didn 39 t The next morning I asked her about it and she balked again about having to sign an agreement and made a lame excuse as to why she couldn 39 t send it to me on the day that she had promised to do so As you can imagine I decided not to do business with her as she was behaving as if she were doing me a favor when in reality we would have 160 been doing each other a favor and I found her behavior to be disrespectful of me The takeaway here is as follows 1 a business agreement should always be in writing 2 tread carefully if a business person balks about having a written agreement 3 if you feel as if a business person isn 39 t treating you respectfully and or is jerking you around you 39 re better off not doing business with that person 160 No matter how long you know someone you should still treat that person with respect This woman 39 s questionable treatment of me didn 39 t bode well for how she would have treated my clients I can 39 t and won 39 t refer my clients to business people who are disrespectful and or untrustworthy and neither should you
The Marital Contract
Published: :47:--20
There is a wide range of marital contracts today Most marriages are still between two people however there are people who have open marriages polygamist marriages polyamorous marriages and sexless marriages As a traditionalist my concept of marriage involves a marriage between two people For purposes of this post I will discuss marriage between a man and a woman only This is in no way shape or form a political statement Soon you 39 ll understand why I am limiting this discussion to marriage between a man and a woman As I recall I was married and divorced a very long time ago there 39 s a statement in the marriage vows about quot forsaking all others quot Although marriage means different things to different people and although people marry for a variety of reasons most would agree that the traditional marriage contract includes sexual relations between the two married people After all how can one expect one 39 s spouse to forsake all others if one is not living up to his or her marital contract There are some people who are asexual and others who have a very low sex drive If the spouses of these people have a normal sex drive they are bound to be dissatisfied with the state of their union They are faced with some difficult choices They can go for counseling with their spouses go outside of the marriage for sex become celibate or get a divorce Counseling is probably a good first step however it might not help 160 It is my contention that 1 people who are asexual or who have a low sex drive should find each other and marry each other 2 a married person cannot expect fidelity from his or her partner if he or she is unwilling to hold up his or her end of the marital contract and 3 a person who has a healthy sex drive should not have to deny his or her needs because of a partner who is too selfish to satisfy those needs Although I could discuss this in terms of men not fulfilling the marital contract I will discuss it in terms of women not doing so as that seems to be the more typical scenario I had recently written a blog post about the importance of honesty in relationships Unfortunately there doesn 39 t seem to be enough of this as based on what I hear from men whom I know well there are women who pretend to be sexual beings to quot snag quot a man and then once they 39 ve accomplished their objective slack off regarding fulfilling their husband 39 s sexual needs I am not suggesting here that a woman has to go along with all of her husband 39 s sexual demands or that she has to comply every time her husband wants relations What I am suggesting is that a woman who isn 39 t selfish will do her best to acquiesce to most or at least many of her husband 39 s sexual needs assuming that they aren 39 t repugnant to her and will try to satisfy him sometimes even when she doesn 39 t feel like doing so A man shouldn 39 t have to deny his needs or martyr himself because his spouse doesn 39 t especially enjoy sex or no longer cares about satisfying him sexually 160 Apparently some post-menopausal women find intercourse to be very painful I can understand why these women might not want to subject themselves to pain However there are many other ways to satisfy one 39 s partner that these women can employ In my opinion to deny one 39 s mate the enjoyment for which you both contracted on your wedding day is to break the marital contract and is to show a lack of love and empathy for one 39 s partner I am not suggesting that sex is the only component of a good marriage however it is an integral component of a good marriage and it is something that nobody should be denied unless there is an upfront agreement between the two partners that the marriage will be a sexless one In my opinion being in a marriage that has become sexless is a very sad state of affairs and is something that doesn 39 t need to be tolerated as it 39 s a broken marriage due to a broken marital contract
The Importance Of Honesty In Relationships
Published: 30:0--20
People of all ages are in the dating pool If you 39 re a woman you might be tempted to fudge some of your stats as approximately one-third to two-fifths of the male population is looking for younger thin women If you 39 re a man you might be tempted to fudge your financial stats or education credentials Both genders might post pictures of themselves on dating websites that are 10 - 20 years old All of this posturing and misrepresentation is a recipe for disaster as you won 39 t look like your picture and if you 39 re not well-educated your writing and speech will give you away Most people don 39 t appreciate being lied to and many will end the date before you have a chance to impress them with your scintillating personality In dating it 39 s always better to be honest There is no charade that can be kept up indefinitely and a relationship that is built on lies is a relationship that won 39 t last 160 We all have our quirks and imperfections and should focus on those who like and love us because of or despite those quirks and imperfections Honesty is just as important after marriage If you behave one way before marriage and change your behavior dramatically after marriage your spouse is likely to become a very unhappy camper Many divorces have been caused by people who pretended to be someone else before marriage and who revealed their true personalities characters and behavior after marriage If your self-esteem is shaky or if you 39 re a compulsive liar you 39 re better off going into therapy than pretending to be someone else If all you care about is short-term results you can fool some people but that won 39 t bring you any happiness unless you 39 re a psychopath or sociopath 160 The best relationships are those between people who value and practice love friendship honesty trust and communication Until you 39 re ready to practice these concepts you might be better off remaining in the dating pool
Going With The Flow
Published: 2:04--/2
In the hurried pace at which many of us live we often forget to take time to smell the roses I know that I do Thanksgiving Day is a difficult day for many of us as it brings back memories of departed loved ones with whom we used to celebrate the day and it can bring forth thoughts of those with whom we 39 d like to share the day but for any of a number of reasons can 39 t There isn 39 t only one way to handle melancholic feelings This morning I chose to do something that I haven 39 t done in too long a time I listened to music that I love Although I 39 m dating myself by saying who one of my all-time favorite ballad singers is I must admit that I can 39 t resist listening to Johnny Mathis sing songs like quot Begin the Beguine quot quot Misty quot quot How Do You Keep the Music Playing quot quot Too Much Too Little Too Late quot and many others Music absolutely stirs my emotions For example I can never listen to quot How Do You Keep the Music Playing quot without crying It 39 s an astoundingly beautiful song with meaningful lyrics and if you 39 ve never heard it I suggest you go to You Tube and download Johnny Mathis 39 version of the song You won 39 t be sorry On the other end of the spectrum Pharrell Williams 39 quot Happy quot always has its intended effect on me which is to make me feel happy A couple of years ago I went to a jazz performance with a friend As I love jazz and as I especially enjoyed the arrangements the musicians performed I told my friend that listening to jazz transports me I wasn 39 t exaggerating There is nothing wrong with allowing ourselves to feel all of our emotions even the more unpleasant ones That means of course that sometimes we can feel melancholic or nostalgic For me it 39 s both soothing and cathartic to listen to music that reflects my mood For some it 39 s fine art for others it 39 s dance Any of the arts nature sports food etc can transport us Sometimes it 39 s best to just go with the flow until the mood passes While you 39 re going with the flow why not immerse yourself in your favorite music Since it 39 s still Thanksgiving Day for those of you who mistakenly think that you have nothing to be thankful for I have something for you BE THANKFUL THAT YOU WEREN 39 T BORN A TURKEY Happy Thanksgiving Day
Thank You So Much For Your Support
Published: 39:0--20
Although I might not respond to your comments about my blog promptly it 39 s not because I don 39 t want to it 39 s because there are only so many hours in the day and at the end of the day I need some r amp r before going to sleep I work hard for my money wasn 39 t there a song quot She works hard for her money quot 160 I can 39 t tell you how much I appreciate your very flattering comments about my writing my content how much you relate to what I write etc Hearing how much you enjoy my blog posts makes writing them worthwhile even when I struggle to come up with a topic of interest Please don 39 t think that I 39 m ungrateful if you don 39 t hear back from me promptly I 39 m sure that you have the same problem that I have too much to do and too little time in which to do it Thank you so much for your support I appreciate it much more than you might think Sincerely Laura
Good Relationships Require Work
Published: 54:0--20
Most of us have experienced what I 39 ll refer to as lopsided relationships These are friendships or romantic relationships in which one person is doing most of the pursuing i e making most of the phone calls or doing most of the emailing or texting giving more of his or her time money understanding transparency in short showing more interest than the other party These friendships or romantic relationships are not good relationships as in order for a relationship to work there needs to be a give and take with both people doing equal amounts of giving and taking When this equality is lacking if the one who is doing all or most of the giving has any brains and is together emotionally he or she will ultimately lose interest in the relationship Needless to say there are times in any relationship when one person does more of the giving or taking however this should not be the overall theme of the relationship If you 39 re doing most or all of the giving or pursuing you 39 ll tire of this and come to the realization that the friendship or relationship isn 39 t fulfilling your needs and you 39 ll most likely move on as you should Some people assume that once they 39 ve established a relationship they no longer have to work at it These people don 39 t truly understand the nature of a good relationship If you want to keep a husband wife girlfriend boyfriend or friend you need to do the work that is required to keep the relationship going in the same way that you would do the work that is required to keep a business relationship going I realize that this might sound like too much work and not enough fun but no matter how compatible two people are there will be occasional differences that arise and that have to be worked out to the satisfaction of both people I guess what I 39 m trying to say is that you should never take people who are important to you for granted The person who feels that he or she is being taken for granted will build up resentment and will probably distance him- or herself from you You might not even realize that this is happening as you 39 re so wrapped up in your own needs and interests that you don 39 t notice that your friend lover husband or wife has checked out emotionally The relationship is in trouble and you don 39 t even know it My advice to you is to think about why this person has distanced him- or herself from you and the part that you 39 ve played in the current situation The next order of business so to speak is to correct the problem before it 39 s too late Most people want to feel appreciated for their efforts and their interest and if you fail to do that you 39 re on the way to losing someone who is or has been important to you Once this loss occurs you probably won 39 t be able to regain the relationship in a way that satisfies your needs as the person will have for all intents and purposes moved on My experience has shown me that good people are hard to find Be smart be present be thoughtful be giving and be genuinely interested in your relationships so that you don 39 t find yourself without those relationships that you value and that have sustained you If you do the work that is required you will most likely be glad that you did